The Last Days of the Broken Goddess
by FirstFrost
Summary: [Set after Timeskip OC storyline] A thousand words, and she can only say sorry. But, what is she apologising for, and why?


_(( A:N – If you don't like it, then basically, don't read it. How much simpler would you like it to be? I know, that sounded mean. Anyway, introduction of an OC or two and the divergence of Naruto into a storyline that has nothing to do with manga or anime. YAY for randomness! ))_

--:: **The Last Days of the Broken Goddess** ::--

**01: Prologue – Memory**

A fire is a funny thing.

It burns bright and hot, yet the heat held no fear for her. It illuminated the small grove where they had set up for the night, setting leaping shadows and bright lights across the small glade. On the ground, in their sleeping bags, her students slept unaware that she stayed awake, staring into the flames, searching as each night since childhood had passed for the answers to riddles that plagued her.

She knew that soon she would be home, soon she would be back in the sprawl of a village and they would be looking down on her sternly, judging her without words and only their stone, immovable eyes watching. When she had decided to leave the village, she had fled those accusing eyes, hoping never to see them again, hoping that the taint on her soul would wash away if she did enough good deeds, if she could keep others from the harm she had brought inadvertently down onto the village.

But here she was, sat by the fire and staring into the flames that ate away at the kindling and scraps of paper she had to use as a firelighter, unwilling to expend the energy needed to use the fire jutsu.

It was keenly chillier than other nights she had endured in the open and she drew her thick blanket close to her shoulders, eyes rising up to glance through the strands of her fringe to the sleeping, peaceful faces of her students. One girl, two boys, all of them with strange new powers the like of which was unheard of in Ninja society, all of which required help to control their gifts and in some respects their curses. Because of their unique and dangerous situations, she had promised each one that she would help to shoulder their burden.

Because it was not only a good thing to do, but it was also the right thing to do.

Hadn't he once told her that to help others, she should reach out to them with both hands?

…hadn't she adored him?

Sighing, she realised the circle, the endless and unforgiving circle the thoughts in her head kept rolling around to and with bitterness marking the otherwise smooth and beautiful contours of her face, she trooped a little way from the fire and turned over, rolling onto her side to try and sleep.

But even when she invaded the light burning in the distance with the shadow from her closed eyelids, there was no peace.

------------

…_it was a slaughter._

_There was blood everywhere and on the floor of the first house, curled into a foetal ball was the figure of the young boy, bearing dark navy clothes and the stamp of his clan. He shook like a leaf in the wind, sobbing gently into hands that were stained deeply red and black by the drying of blood._

_She came to him without thinking, pressing him close to her chest and staring at the scene with horrified eyes. She didn't know what to do or what to say._

_In his wide brimmed hat and lined face filled with aching sorrow, the leader, the man she had unswervingly swore fealty to, just looked across the courtyard and the bodies lying inert, as if sleeping but only forever. Then his brown eyes, filled with compassion and kindness came to rest on her as she held the shaking and sobbing boy._

"_Reiko, what happened here?"_

_She shook her head in dismay, trying not to pin the answer on who she knew it would be. She didn't want it to be. But the boy against her chest shrieked out in the aftermath of some horrible agony that ran far deeper than any knife or any grief, "Brother! Why!"_

_Then he was struggling, a wild animal in her arms, scratching at her face. His hands landed, she tried to keep him still. One blow scored deep enough – she bore it to this day, a shallow gouge of a silvery scar beneath her right eye. But still she held on, she held on even if he would wrench her arms out._

"_I'm sorry," Reiko whispered with shuddering despair._

_She repeated it. It was her mantra, a new chant she repeated at any altar, any home, at his bedside._

_She was sorry._

_Because this was her fault._

…_slinking into the night, she left with a heavy, guilt ridden heart to try and find him, to try and find some peace in the dirty world…_

…_because… this was her fault._

_She never said goodbye. She never waited for her old team to return home from missions and training to kiss each cheek, hug them and promise lies that she would come home. She left only a little note for the silver haired lover and slipped away, taking with her the blessing of the Hokage and vowing to never return to their watching, judging eyes – to… to bear the weight of his eyes…_

…_Because. This was… all her fault…_

_----------------_

"Izanagi?"

The girl with dark hair sat up sleepily, rubbing at an eye and then glaring at the kid who had woken her, Izanagi Endo, all red haired and fiery eyed. But this night, he was strained with worry and he pointed.

"Sayuri… Reiko-sama, she's weeping…"

Sayuri Miyagi looked to where he was pointing, squinting in the dark – she noted with a slight frump of indignation that he hadn't bothered to wake Tetsuya up, he slept like the dead in his blankets! Sure enough, their sensei lay on her side and the tears escaping down her cheeks and over her nose to dot the ground as she slept glinted with the firelight. Sayuri wasn't entirely sure what to say.

Since day one, where she'd been discovered by the strange woman she had grown to love, respect, if not admire in some ways (despite how derogatory she could be to Reiko when the mood suited her) the young shinobi had never once seen anything like the tears escaping tonight.

Her violet eyes clenched at the corners with compassion, then she snaked a hand out and tugged on Izanagi's hair, making him wince. It was so dark she hoped she was actually yanking on his hair…

"Don't watch," she whispered.

"Is she in pain?"

"If she is, she wouldn't tell us about it, would she? I don't… think it's a pain we can heal." She patted her chest, trying to indicate the heart area, "It's a pain in here."

"Is it because we're getting close to… to Konoha?"

Sayuri scowled at him in the blackness, "How do I know!?"

"…"

From the blankets, a dry and unemotional voice said softly, "Do you mind? Sleep now. Discuss in the morning."

"Sorry Tetsuya-kun," she hissed, and then with a final glare, she flung herself back into the comfort of her blankets and tried hard not to think about her sensei, weeping in her sleep and what exactly could terrify her so much about going home to Konoha after all this time…


End file.
